a view from under the pew: amos and the ugly mole

Gary Mitchell: Religion columnist

amos the churchmouse:

a view from under the pew

Editor’s note: Amos is a churchmouse, who types by hurling himself at the keys, but he can’t use the capital shift keys, and he shuns punctuation marks – except dashes and hyphens.

amos and the ugly mole

boss i was looking at my

reflection in the toilet

bowl the other day and i

noticed a growth just

under my whiskers

what is that i asked

myself and i leaned

over for a closer look

and nearly fell in

it was a mole

exclamation point here

boss a big fat ugly

mole - i don t think

there are any small

slim and cute ones

anywhere - but there

it was big as life on

my little hairy face

i m ugly i shouted

to no one in particular

and jumped up and

down and nearly fell

in the bowl again

oh why was i born

with such an ugly

form i bemoaned

my awful fate

and soon my revulsion

turned to pure hate

i hate you you re

ugly i told the face in

the toilet bowl

you re no good you re

worthless you moley soul

in my anger and

despair