My turn: My lines leave an impression

I read on Yahoo (so it must be true) that it's OK to exaggerate or be a little outrageous to get people's attention at parties.

I don't remember the icebreakers, but here are a few of my own to guarantee a lasting impression.

"Your hair has a real sheen. You must be a scuba diver."

"You look very athletic. In fact, you remind me of someone who

blocked three of my shots."

"Just think by comparison how good you'll look next to me."

"Did you leave any appetizers for me?"

"You must live here? You couldn't possibly have been invited."

"To be honest, I don't think that I can be without offending

you."

"Is he your boyfriend or just someone to remind you why you stopped drinking?"

"My Corvette is being detailed; this bicycle is just a rental."

"I'm not saying that I'm not rich, just that it would be

inappropriate to ask."

"I didn't expect to see someone like you here — and I mean that sincerely."

"I've seen better pot-lucks at a soup kitchen."

"Frankly, my dear, I'm not surprised that you're on the lam … Oh, you brought the ham."

"Will you be singing Pavarotti during karaoke?"

"Can I bring you another drink, or just the breathalyzer?"

"They say that everyone gets better-looking at closing time. I'll be back later."

"I normally don't discuss politics, but I vote that we get outta here."

Wendel Sloan gives you permission to use his lines. Contact: [email protected]