Spouse briefs: Marriages more common among military members

Recently a study published online in the Journal of Family Issues found that despite all the stress faced by military members with constant deployments their rates of divorce were the same or less than the civilian population. There have been so many stories in the news recently that paint a picture of military marriages and families in crisis. It is not easy to forget the stories of husbands that come home from the trauma of war and take it out on their family members, or the accounts of spouses who do not remain faithful during a deployment. Personally I've known a few families that haven't made it past a deployment without divorce becoming inevitable. But for those few unfortunate situations, I have seen hundreds more whose marriages are still going strong. Women and men who faithfully waited for each phone call, email or letter. Mothers who took upon themselves the burden of single parenting for a year and eased not only their aching heart but that of their children. Most amazing of all many military families haven't faced physical separation once or twice but multiple times over the years. The strength of the military marriage is a tribute to both those serving and those standing beside them.

As interesting as the divorce rate comparison was, I was stunned by how much more common marriage was among military members than in the civilian population. Military members marry more frequently and at a younger age then the general population. Even more incredible was the marriage rate among minority males. The study showed that common social problems facing minority populations are greatly diminished by military service. They have stronger family bonds and have marriages that last longer.

What causes this difference between the civilian population and the military population? I think much of that difference comes down to motivation. Taking that step into military service requires not just one decision but also a whole host of responsible choices. In addition, serving in the military is a doorway out of poverty available to all willing to work. I would surmise from this that the average military member is a cut above the general population. The experiences and maturity they develop during military service greatly strengthen their communities when they return home.

I am grateful for my military marriage and I admire all those that choose to serve. No one is perfect and there is always room for improvement, but their choice to volunteer defines a lot of what is great about our country. They deserve our thanks and most especially our faithfulness as military spouses while they serve at home or abroad.

Rebecca Adling started life as an Air Force brat and is now enjoying life as a mother raising her own pile of adorable Air Force brats.