McGee: The post-surgery experience

link Grant McGee

So my eye surgery has come and gone.

There were rules to follow: Wear a special metal cup over your eye when you sleep, bathe your eyeball in high-dollar eye drops, don’t bend over, don’t lift heavy things, don’t rub your eye and on and on.

I didn’t know what would happen if I bent over or lifted stuff, was my new lens going to pop out?

Then a new floater appeared in my vision. You know what a floater is, it’s some kind of eye-schmutz that floats around in your eyeball.

I started moving my eye around.

“It’s like a tiny flying dragon,” I said. I was making the new floater dance around by moving my eyeball this way and that.

“Would you stop,” said The Lady of the House without putting down her newspaper. “You’re supposed to be resting your eye.”

“Did I do something to make this new floater?”

“I’m sure it’s just blood leaking from your brain,” said The Lady of the House.

“No it’s not,” I said, “is it? And there are these itty-bitty black flecks floating around too, what could they be?”

The Lady of the House put down her paper and looked at me over the top of her glasses.

“I’m sure it is just ash from the cigarette the doctor was smoking during your operation,” she said.

I stopped looking at the show going on in my eye and turned to her.

“They don’t smoke in the operating room,” I said. “Besides, I would’ve remembered something like that.”

“No you would not, you were sedated,” she said. Then she rolled her eyes, “I’M KIDDING, GEEZ! Stop worrying. It’s only been two days.”

The days have gone by. I’ve had my other eye done and I can see again.

It’s wonderful.

I still have to put the high-dollar eye drops in, and I still shouldn’t lift things.

At least that’s what I’m telling The Lady of the House when it comes to chores.

Grant McGee is a long-time broadcaster and former truck driver who rides bicycles and likes to talk about his many adventures on the road of life. Contact him a his blog: grantmcgeewrites.com.