Handouts don't have force of law

The Associated Press has so many rules about writing, I’m probably violating one now. There are so many rules on spelling, punctuation and capitalization they’re in an annual edition called the AP Stylebook.

Some of them are easy to remember. Spell out percent every single time and never use the % sign. If it’s less than 10, spell it out; if it’s 10 or more, use numbers.

Some of them aren’t so easy to explain, if you’ll remember my column just before Presidents / President’s / Presidents’ Day.

Some of them make perfect sense once explained, like this one: Don’t use a gender, ethnic or racial description unless it’s relevant. The general example I grew up with was that you shouldn’t call Connie Chung an Asian reporter because you wouldn’t call Peter Jennings a white reporter; they’re just reporters.

I thought it just made sense. But apparently, it’s the media banning Americans from any mentions of race, gender or ethnicity.

A few days ago, political commentator Tucker Carlson warned the public of an impending ban on the word “man.” He brought on one of his go-to correspondents and discussed the evil spread of Purdue University’s Online Writing Lab.

The segment focused on the “Stereotypes and Biased Language” handout available through the free instructional series. Instead of “man’s achievements,” the handout suggests “human achievements.” Instead of “man-made,” try “synthetic.”

Carlson facetiously asked, “What if you lived in MANchester, Vermont?”

Well, his sidekick said, maybe somebody will get offended by that, setting Carlson up.

“If something offends somebody, even if you’ve never met that person, you have to change it,” Carlson said. “So doesn’t that mean a small group of super unhappy people gets to control what the rest of us say and think?”

Since correspondent Cathy Areu didn’t say it, I will: No. The handout makes no reference to proper names, the strawman argument Carlson uses to make this only 99 percent ridiculous.

A lab handout doesn’t have the force of law, and there’s no real way to control what somebody says and thinks — though repeated exposure to Carlson’s program might impair said abilities.

Had Carlson invited somebody associated with the writing lab, or any competent writing instructor, they’d have explained it. Or Carlson could have quoted OWL’s handout: “How you approach your audience, what assumptions you make or expectations you assume about it are choices you make as a writer. We merely share what our professional associations advocate, among them the National Council of Teachers of English (NCTE) and its Conference on College Composition and Communication. We invite you to explore or ask your own professional or disciplinary organizations for guidance.”

I’m looking forward to the Merriam-Webster-Carlson Dictionary’s new entry.

Ban (n): An invitation to seek guidance from a trusted professional, with acknowledgment you’re free to make your own choices.

Then the segment took a turn. Carlson continued. “It’s one thing to bully the little rich kids that go to your school, because what do they know? Do you think they would have the guts to go to GoldMAN Sachs in New York and say, ‘Change your name now, or ELSE.’”

His correspondent said they probably would just not shop there, at which point Carlson pointed out they wouldn’t shop there. Goldman Sachs is a bank and not a clothing store.

My apologies: It was an investigative piece all along.

Kevin Wilson is managing editor of The Eastern New Mexico News. Contact him at: [email protected]